should i tell my husband about my past? islam

I will address your points one by one: 1. Does he also have to tell all about them to her? This girl could possibly be the ideal spouse for the man in question, but he could lose out on that because of this one sin that she repented from. I had yet to fall in love or have sex. How to Move Forward When You're in a Sexless Marriage | GQ And its heavier than what one person can truly hold we arent built with stamina to carry it all day, every day. As we kissed and groped, I couldnt stop my thoughts from reeling out into the depths. Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) said: One who has repented of a sin is like one who has never sinned at all! Your husband should not threaten you with his displeasure if you dont tell him about your past. Do not share any more about it, especially if you feel God has forgiven you and brought you closer through this journey., If your husband can not let go of this matter, he needs to seek counsel. Brother, Allah forgives the worst of sins, if a person repents sincerely and betters him/herself. Now the situation is so bad on my side that I can't even explain it to you. Your future is his business. Why it should be a sin to tell, that you arent a virgin now? He also said that if he later found out that i had a boyfriend he woukd divorce me on the spot! His justification was that he was hurt why didnt she tell him the truth before marriage then he wouldnt have married her as he wantedca pure wife. my husband was married with two kids when i married him.His wife was terminally ill.I just wanted to marry a pious man so i overlooked his first marriage and many other things. This does not mean lying. I feel that I have no stability and no peace. If you are a good decent person then don't take from another person what they consider precious and waited to share it with some one, not necessarily another virgin but with someone they love, trust and care for. But how could i find out this information without looking into his past?! The prospective spouse can make of that what he wishes. You dont have to marry a person, who you dont love. We are using the Quran and the hadiths to state/apology/protect our own lifestyle. Research published in 2020 revealed the most frequently given reasons for divorce from a sample of more than 2,000 people. How camn i do that ? Over several months, thanks to social media and the help of friends, this ostrich man and I became friends. The examination department's head was a nice lady so she asked me if I took the paper out the lab I honestly told her no I didn't then she asked me if I gave that paper to a boy I told her I didn't and then how the boy got that paper I told her I didn't know cause I didn't want my friend to get in trouble cause this was our final exam and if we are caught cheating then our papers are cancelled. Dying is a natural process that the body has to work at. The loan I have already taken out to pay the tuition fees would be pointless if I continue this way. Technically, it is not his business. If you commit a sin then you can ask Allah for forgiveness but you can't disclose your sin to anyone.Its another sin.Its want I heard. Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. In some cases, the person comes from a culture or a family in which death is simply not discussed. Knowledge is only beneficial if we act upon it. Thirdly, stop thinking about how to find excuses please you wasting your time, just repent and cry to allah trust me thats the only thing you got nothing els. From what I have read so far, is it not neccessary to be truthful about what one is selling of himself or herself ? If however it was recent, less than a month or you're still involved with the situationyou cannot get married as you are committing Zina. It will only add fuel to fire. It may be that the sister who sinned and repented is better than the one who never sinned. Gods 29.th Name is as far as I know is: Al-Adl. Remember this all the time, Good comes from Allah Azza Wajal and bad comes from us, from our deeds. what about all the young women forced to get married to abusive men thier are so many situations where good women are in bad marriages so i dont agree with your point because life is a test. If brother waseem cleared about concealing past sins with authentic hadees..( along with the thing that the sinner have repented deeply) then u should not overAsk the same thing u are not pointing brother waseem u are instead pointing Hadees. .ahadees or any thing from quran shouldnt b overAsked by questioning.. well i m not critisizing u but its simply clear that if once husband know that kind of past sin .. he wont b able to love his wife so wife shouldnt tell about her past sin like that.. same goes for a husband . You've asked many different questions here. And if you distort [your testimony] or refuse [to give it], then indeed Allah is ever, with what you do, Acquainted. Speaking about your past is not required in Islam, your sins are your secrets and only Allah knows about those, so you are free to keep whatever secrets from whoever you want, as long as that secret will have no effect on this person's life or future. Stop barraging your wife with questions it was way in the past before she'd even met you. Has he cut all ties with his past and his wrong deeds, or not? Not with the intention of bad mouthing, or to be vindictive, but to make the person aware so that they can make a more informed decision about whether to marry them or not. May be on the first night when he came to know that my wife is not a virgin he may think its not the fault of herself its the fault of me. The cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. If yoy don't mind i just wanted to ask. I worry for my kids and pray that they dont follow this haraam path. As its natural if your a virgin you want a virgin spouse and if your not virgin it may not matter. As times goes on, the woman could not withstand it. Workers save turtles on migration path through dry-cleaning business. Sex How to Move Forward When You're in a Sexless Marriage A Q&A with a clinical psychologist who specializes in getting couples to talk openly about sex. Sorry for my bad English. Zinaa is NOT a sin committed against your future husband or wife, and there is no need to ask one's spouse for forgiveness for sins committed in the past, before you even met them. If you know what to do then do it. When to Walk Away After Infidelity: 7 Signs It`s Time To Leave - Divorce And the second thing is that it doesn't matter what all people here saying because in a way we are all right but in a way we are all wrong. Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features. if you yourself confess it later, i hope he would realize your honestly and would forgive you, it is better than he finding out that himself when you would still have concealed it, then he would think that you are not honest. Allaah accepts peoples repentance without their having to confess or expose their sins to any other person. When You Learn About His (or Her) Sexual Past. You are a servant of Allah and you have committed a sin. This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. And I just realised you're the editor of the site.Let me see how good of a Muslim are you: whether or not you will censor this comment will show how open you are to criticsm yourself. This does not absolve one of the responsibility to be Muslim and honor our trusts, tell the truth etc. But for some people its just a word or they are looking from the perpective of the sinner. repentance, so you are on the right track in mending your relation with Allah, and to take it one step forward do your best to increase in good deeds as Allah (SWT) says in the Quran: And establish prayer at the two ends of the day and at the approach of the night. pllzz ans me imediately according to islamic point of view i had sex with my EX bf bef. Betrayal is something people just know, if they have been betrayed. IslamicAnswers.com Editor. This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Sister marriage is gift from allah. I hope this comment is not too late. The Day of Judgment is going to be so heavy and momentous on every single soul that no one will care about anyone else. I really love God, because God always tells us the truth and gave us the Quran to pass tricky situations and the best men ever living in the universe: The prophet Mohammed. When should you tell your boyfriend or girlfriend about the sexual sins in your past relationships? It has his reasons. Whoever reveals to us his wrong action, we apply the prescribed punishments as stated in the Book of Allah against him" . I tried to built guts n I said him truth Now I repent saying truth bacaus I lost him him. I m not virgin !! Since my partner knows about my past, it makes certain conversations easier. If it is found out later that one lied the marriage becomes void, or he or she can simply ask for a divorce from the offender unless both are known to be offenders. Do I need to tell partners I have HPV? - Slate Magazine Secrets Men Keep from Women - What Husbands Don't Tell Wives - Woman's Day It does not store any personal data. She is not bothered about what she has done and how shameful and used up she is! I've just submited my post again. Wael is of the opinion that you should continue to hide this and bases this opinion on a hadeeth, which is a correct position but only when applied to deeds long past and irrelevant to today. I have the same case, I asked my wife everything before I got married and she lied to me about everything and on top of that she continued doing it until before we got married, But now I know, that I am going to marry a clean wife, which is hopefully a virgin. However, there is no such thing as virgin pills, and if there is then it's a scam and a waste of money, as it certainly will do nothing. Any future spouse has no right or responsibility to know this private information. All sins to Allah, will be forgiven by Allah (if u repent to Allah) . you never know there is always a possibilty him finding out and things will be far worse, when you could have told him right from the start and save all the trouble. Definitely do not reveal your sin. and if one of you is tried by committing any of them, then let him conceal them as Allaah has concealed them for him. [Al-Haakim], This is so dangerous that Imaam Ibn Taymiyyah said: People should refrain from praying over the dead person who was known to openly expose his sins to others as a means to prevent others from acting like him., If anyone knows about your sin, then that person should hide it, too. Of course, if I got married for the first time, I would have wished I got married to a woman who is a virgin and who wouldn't have given herself to anyone before doing Nikah with me. But if he doesnt dont confess. I wish her and her husband well, Inn Sha Allah. I think you know the answer. If He has chosen that man for you then He might had chosen just fully. We both asked each other about our pasts as my husband also wanted a chaste wife. Sometimes we need to put it down. You won't called as liar, cheated wife. You ask whether you should hide these sins, and the clear answer is YES. We are not Catholics, who must confess their sins to a priest. Allah, by His Mercy, has protected you and covered your sins, and you shouldkeep to that coverand never reveal it, neither to your family nor to anyone else. Resurrection. [Al-Bukhaari & Muslim]. ? In many cultures, a woman could be putting her life at risk by "confessing" such a sin. Because Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said: Whoever covers up the fault of a Muslim, Allaah will cover up his fault(s) on the Day of Of course you should not tell him, that you made a sin, but you should tell him, that you arent a virgin now. They were: Lack of love/intimacy Communication issues Lack of sympathy/respect/trust Growing apart Know the Signs There are some marriage concerns, like abuse, that should be absolute deal-breakers. This would again put the woman in danger and might even make it difficult for any sisters she has to get married. In fact, it was the only relationship Id been in. If Allah has kept your secret uptil now then have faith in HIM that Almighty will keep your secret undisclosed forever. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance". You are just making the same mistake again and again. My friends husband then started verbally abusing her and said that he cant trust her anymore. before I will go to my answer I should tell you that all this is just my personal OPINION and NOT a FETWA. and a woman is soft and sensitve by nature .by allah I ask you if a man hides and a wife knows later on then he wont be questioned much.So forgive her and not let shaytan be happy. A number of the Sahaabah had committed adultery and murder repeatedly, or had buried infant girls alive, or stolen things, but when they entered Islam they were the best of people.
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